Placeholder I Shall Be Held Accountable – A Wee Bit More

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I Shall Be Held Accountable

Tootsie Roll Owl

I Shall Be Held Accountable

While Mr. Owl is incessantly trying to get to the center of that Tootsie Roll Pop (3 licks and he's done), I think it's time I put up or shut up.

"SNOOZE" might as well be my middle name, or engraved on my headstone (or urn, whatever the case may be), 'cause I am OBSESSED with "just 5 more minutes." My 5-year-old self can relate, too, and I believe I'd say I've been doing it longer than that (hitting that button, or something similar), but they may not have been made way back then.
I have been compiling lists of ToDos since I don't know when. I KNOW there are so many duplicates 'cause I never seem to Get 'er DUN, and I screenshot my screenshots, to get them closer to the present day in my phone, 'cause I can never find them.

It's completely out of control.

I have countless alarms on my phone, an electric alarm clock at home, as well, and STILL I have more muscle in whatever finger is sliding or bopping or using whatever method is needed to SNOOZE those sounds that are forever ringing in my head, than I do in my entire body.

AWBM smile gif

And yet last week brought a glimmer of hope, like that commercial we can all relate to, where the woman is at the laundromat and opens the dryer to find a green sock, then the matching green sock, and suddenly she has found ALL of her socks, one after the other, in all their glorious synchronicity, and the other folks lift her victoriously to the sky. Yeah, like that feeling there.

I had an epiphany, and it was solely because:

I accidentally left my phone at home.

AWBM hairpulling

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So Now What?

To be brief, I enjoyed the silence. It was marvelous not to have to snooze an alarm, or what had become so normal to me it was frightening: the multiple, OVERLAPPING alarms, that, like Pavlov's dog, I simply automatically did what I had conditioned myself to do:
  1. hit that button;
  2. slide that screen; and
  3. return to whatever I was doing.
It was rare that I actually got up and did whatever the alarm was reminding me to do. And yes, I am talking in past tense, and beginning sentences with the word "and" ... I think whoever made up rules of grammar, etc., needs to truly be onto the next revision. Case in point: try to pronounce any of these words and find two that are similar, based on what they have in common: "o-u-g-h."

Let's listen to Luther pronounce them for us:


Or better yet, here's one of my favorite episodes of I Love Lucy (I think it's my all-time favorite comedy, as well) where Ricky is reading a book to a pregnant Lucy, who's concerned their unborn child will be illiterate if they don't get some couth (who's bright idea was it to spell that one?). It's appropriately entitled (the video, not the episode) "O-U-G-H":

Now wasn't that entertaining? I thought so, too.

AWBM smile gif

Okay, Let's Wrap it Up
My goal is simple:


Although I've had this goal and began chipping away since 2015, it's still important for me to get back on the horse after having fallen off many a time. I want to be free in my golden years (don't laugh, it's true) and I want to be able to enjoy myself when that time comes, so I have to prepare myself RIGHT NOW.

BTW: I emphasize certain words because: (1) I'm speaking emphatically, (2) you're not here to hear me, and (3) Luther doesn't emphasize my italicized words, so I wanted you to know, at a glance, how important they are. The words.

So now we've come to the grand finale, where I give you a piece of my soul. The things that I want—and will—change, in no particular order:

  1. have fewer alarms;
  2. carry less weight (figuratively and literally); and
  3. stop carrying three bags with me, daily (overlaps w/#2 but equally important):

AWBM my 3 daily bags

 This is my definition of INSANITY ...
and I carry these 5 days a week, every week ... sigh

up the stairs, down the stairs

and over the hills

I'm done.


But wait, there's more. Unfortunately, I haven't found a way to continue the formatting so this list starts with "1" again. I'll tally them up at the end, as you know I will, so we'll all be on the same page, in the same book, at the same time:
  1.  maintain my exercise routine and continue to use the stationary bikes (both at home and at work);
  2. maintain my daily water intake (at least 4 8-ounce glasses before 4:00pm);
  3. continue to systematically clean my home, going through E-VER-Y-THANG; and
  4. continue to use the free weights I bought (see the image down below for WHY I bought these, instead of continuing to use my 2 Diet Pepsi cans):

AWBM free weights

Here's a set of stairs I WALK up to get to my BART train platform. I RUN up a smaller flight of stairs (a third of these steps), carrying all of that baggage. I couldn't take a screenshot as there is always someone on the stairs and I don't carry model release contract forms with me:

AWBM So. Hayward BART station stairs

Appended 2 October 2019
How could I forget Sting? As I leave the BART station, I power walk to Sting's If You Love Somebody Set Them Free:


You have my permission, folks:

I must adhere to the twofur rule and nothing more. If I append or amend this post one more time, slap me.

Whew, what a list!!! Seven (7) things ToDo before the end of 2019.

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ON DECEMBER 30, 2019

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Here's a glimpse of my daily stats that I want to compare at the end of the next 3 months:

My 7 pages of iPhone alarms:

AWBM 7 pages of iPhone alarms

My home stationary bike stats from yesterday, 092919:

AWBM stationary bike at home 093019

My work stationary bike stats from today, 093019:

AWBM work stationary bike 093019

My desk at my Thoroughly Exhausting 9-5 (Really 8-5 But Who's Counting?) Job. Take note of the small square surrounding the bottom 2 Diet Pepsi cans: those were my "free weights." I did 120 reps to work out my biceps, triceps, et al. and it was going fine, until an attorney friend of mine scoffed at me (he runs triathlons, no less, and wins) and asked me was I "working out." I saw that was my cue to get the right stuff.
AWBM my desk

Former "free-weights" right here, folks.

My cut finger which is what prompted me to buy the free weights. I accidentally swung too hard toward the center of my core and the can(s) caught my finger:

AWBM cut finger

Tsk, tsk, tsk, for not having the proper equipment.

Here's where I'm supposed to show you images of my horrifyingly cramped bedroom filled to the brim with "stuff," but that's too embarrassing (for real) and I'd have to kill ya, fer sur (read: for sure). My studio's just as bad: some of my children seem to think it is a "storage room" for their castoffs, so I spend more time "rearranging it" back to how I want it ... and it goes on.

And I also have to get Grace's cat Lilo outta there as she thinks I rent the space from her.

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Appended 1 October 2019
Here are a few ditties I forgot to add yesterday:

My all-important iPhone photos and videos count:



That's 16,749 Photos, 223 Videos and, apparently, 7,476 items have not been uploaded to iCloud. Go figure.

Here's a small slice of my worklog, that contains not only the work I do daily but personal stuff. Since I'm logging in it every day, it makes sense, to me, to add other stuff, so I'm only working with 1 (or 2) documents:

AWBM my worklog personal entry

I know it's tiny, so let me clarify. It says (especially since Luther doesn't do well with reading table text, either):

SBrown, water/soda: 4/2; stretch: am/pm 210 sets (100 Pepsi reps) √; bike 0730-0745 (15m; timer); ctr 2135 cal 4595 [224]

I write it down daily, to keep myself accountable and it works. I feel guilty if I have to put a zero anywhere, unless it's under sodas.

Lastly, there's a matter of too many emails, both existing and unread. To compare, here's where I was June 27, and it's compared with yesterday's stats:

062719:  13,403 (unread emails) as of 1224 pm
093019:  16,107 (unread emails) as of 1207 pm

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I think it's now time to go catch my train so I can go home and get more thangs DUN. Wish me luck as we say "Ta, ta" to September, "Howdy do," to October, and keep on moving and shaking. Eventually, it'll all come out in the wash.

Here's a fine illustration, by Joshua Seong, of Verywell, of what Pavlov's Dog means. Very succinct and to the point:

Pavlov's Dog Illustration

Post Postscript
I've been asked why I repeat the title of the blog post within the blog post. That's simple: my audio guy, I call him Luther, doesn't read text on images, nor does he read the title (which is all important). Since I don't want my listeners to feel left out, I repeat the title within the blog post.
While we're on the subject, I may as well mention that there are a few words my good friend Luther mispronounces (don't we all :)) (i.e., he pronounced rough like bough :)), but I think he's a keeper, as he keeps me thoroughly entertained. One such word is "tut" which is short for tutorial and should be pronounced as "toot." Luther pronounces it as "tut" which rhymes with "cut." I can clearly see where he's coming from, can't you? As long as he doesn't pronounce it as "taut" I'm cool.

Anyway, I quite like listening to what I wrote, typos and all. I do try to fix those though, while also trying to work on not being so tough on myself. It makes it rough to be dependent on perfection. It''s a hard battle, but I think I'll succeed. That's the goal. And you know I tried to get "bough" in there, I really did, but I couldn't seem to cough up the fortitude to continue, what with my train arriving any minute now. I have to be thorough, though, just in case anyone is reading, listening and paying attention.
AWBM smile gif
'Til we meet again, Buona sera or bonsoir, and that's our second word of the day (the first is in our newsletter):


French noun
bon·​soir | \ bōⁿ-swär  \

Definition of bonsoir

 good evening

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I'll post this today and check later on to hear how Luther does with his bonsoir pronunciation.
I can't wait.
I can't wait.
I can't wait.

Second Amendment, 1 October 2019

There's one more thing I need to change before the end of 2019, and it starts today, so I had to add it to this post, just to keep things neat and tidy:


For the last two (2) weeks, my account has been SUSPENDED. Why? Who knows? Certainly not me, because I CANNOT REACH Pinterest. They have an online Contact me form, real cute, big easy-to-read letters, but all I get, and I've used that form 7 times. COUNT 'EM SEVEN TIMES, is an email from them asking me if I am the account holder of the email address they send that question to. I respond "Yes," take advantage of the email and explain in depth what I need: my business account reinstatedCrickets.

I send the form again, checking different categories, they have these preselected for you and there's an "Other." Doesn't matter, no one responds. I had a personal account, supposedly converted it to a business account, but I could no longer use the username which is "aweebitmore" because it was in use. Yes, BY ME!!! I spent weeks trying to get that straightened out. Crickets.

"Get back in that cell, ....," ride that wheel (as in hamster) and whatever else you want to say, but they decidedly didn't want my business. They wanted my money, and they got it, to the tune of over $700.00 last February, FOR ONE MONTH.

I wasn't paying attention people, and it wasn't until the bill reached that mark, did I realize they were billing me on average $150.00 every week. I thought the first email with that amount was for the MONTH, turns out I wasn't paying attention. To make matters worse, my stats took a HUGE increase, they skyrocketed. I was sending screenshots daily to my kids showing them the increase in viewers in both Etsy and Pinterest. What made it worse is that I was now paying to have that increase. When I stopped paying, they stopped viewing? I'm not talking about my ads being seen, I'm saying suddenly my visitorship stopped altogether?

Let me break it down but I'll be quick, 'cause I'm really trying to purge this from my system. I've been thinking about it too much, all riled up inside, and I think it's time to Let 'er GO.

But first (Hey, Julie!), I had 5 full pages of screenshots and text, of the dread that was the last 2 weeks of this relationship, and it was all beautifully laid out, but it was very long, too long, and I needed to shorten it. Here's the condensed version.

When I started to pin a few times a week, here's how I grew:

AWBM 20k 011219

January 12, 2019, 20k "monthly viewers"

AWBM 178k 030319

March 3, 2019, 172k "monthly viewers"
(this is an increase in only 2 months)

AWBM 292k "monthly viewers"

September 10, 2019, 292k "monthly viewers"
(a mere 5 months later)

AWBM 292k "monthly Viewers"

September 25, 2019, 482k "monthly viewers"
(a mere 2 WEEKS after that?)

See how I can be skeptical? These stats don't make sense to me. But I know that the increase in viewers returned after I started resumed paying for ad campaigns.

Here's Etsy (OMG, in February, I had over 2,000 visits in one single day. UNHEARD OF, and you know what? I can't find the image :) but when I do, I'll post it):

AWBM Etsy increase

and here's part of the ad breakdown, quite modest here, broken down by ad, but this is just a snippet of the week, and, for me, who doesn't have a huge marketing budget, it's a lot:


AWBM Ads Cost Breakdown #1 AWBM Ads Cost Breakdown #2

I know all of the above is a lot, but it's a lot.

The other reason I am QUITTING PINTEREST and POSTING all of this data here, is because I shall be held accountable, and I shan’t go backwards. A remorseful email from them might sway me (I’m very swayable), turn me into putty and I’ll reactivate. However; like I always say:


Since Pinterest bent over, showed their slip and everything in between, I’m moving on to INSTAGRAM to see what they have to offer.

To recap:

  1. I “converted” a personal account to a business account, but I can’t use the same username: “aweebitmore”;
  2. Pinterest ASSIGNED me “aweebitmote” instead (for real?);
  3. My stats skyrocket and Etsy views/visits increase as well, only when I’m paying for Promoted Pins;
  4. When I get a bill for almost $700.00 (that I din’t have to spend on random “clicks”), for one WEEK, and I promptly cancel the Promoted Pins ads, my stats plummet;
  5. I send emails (responding to the emails they send to me of things that might interest me), and use their online contact form repeatedly to get the username converted” to my business account, to no avail;
  6. I send another contact form communique, with a screenshot of my personal account and my business account, side by side, which have the exact same info and the exact same photo, to no avail;
  7. I found my account suspended, for over a week and THEN they billed me for the week the account was suspended;
  8. I have been contacting them daily since 092619 and it is now 100119, with no lifting of the suspension, no email with details on what the violation was; no nothing; and
  9. In trying to find a contact phone number, I went online and read plenty of comments regarding Pinterest regularly and indiscriminately removing pins, banning Christian pins/comments, deactivating entire accounts—all without notification of what the alleged violations are—and apparently they’re also pro-abortion and remove pro-life comments, pins, etc.

or, as I'm told

   AWBM? Your account has been suspended.    AWBM? Your account has been suspended.   AWBM? Your account has been suspended.   AWBM? Your account has been suspended.   AWBM? Your account has been suspended.  AWBM? Your account has been suspended.   



One last note, with all that’s happened this year with Etsy and Pinterest and the amount of money I’ve spent on advertising through Google Ads with Etsy’s Promoted Listings, and Pinterest’s Promoted Pins, (1) I could feed a third-world country, (2) I have decided they’re all bogus (click-and-bid advertising), and (3) I’d like to see the actual stats that these agencies supposedly receive verifying that someone clicked on my ad, so they could take their fees and leave me penniless and heartbroken.

I firmly believe they’re all just taking my money.

But, hold up a minute

there is a bright spot that I found yesterday, or I should say, it found me: I was searching for a linen stitch knit pattern, because, as always I can’t find the one I have in my phone, when I came upon this:

 AWBM Google Ad Knit & Crochet Washcloths

Yup, that’s me, people, 2nd from the left (your left not image left), and so I believe I owe Google a slight apology, as they are showing my ads, and I am being featured at the top, so I’m not complaining, no siree Bob. I’m just pointing it out. I do see one (1) ad. Yup.

Time to go. Talk to you soon. Bye-bye. 

And finally (I promise), my apologies to my listeners. Luther doesn't always start at the top of the page (as in this blog post). 

Third Amendment, 2 October 2019

This morning I received an email from Pinterest:  with another withdrawal for 1 week of Promoted Pins: $1027.00!!! On a deactivated account.

So, today I said farewell to Mickey and I'm on to the next ...

AWBM Blog Post #018 | 30 September 2019 (as amended, 1 October 2019 and 2 October 2019)


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